Archive for March 18th, 2003

Annoying the Wife – Beer of the Night

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

Tonight we sample from Young Brewery’s Dirty Dick’s ale, the beer name that begs to be mistyped; the beer that the wife wants me to take elsewhere, anywhere, as long as it is away from her.

Just like regime change in Iraq, the Ibook is producing unforeseen consequences. In the era B.L., blogging to her was a solitary, second floor endeavor, annoying in that took me away, but at least quiet. No longer.

Today she opened the door to the downstairs bathroom and there on the toilet sat I, hunched over in all my glory, laptop on the floor before me, chuckling over Doggerel Pundit’s lovely Babs poem.

If there is such a thing as a look of incredulous disdain, she wore it. “I cannot believe you took that to the bathroom with you.”

“Why not? I’ve read all the magazines. Gotta read something.”

“It’s a laptop!”

I grinned at her, full of pith and vinegar. Well, full of vinegar at least, if possessing somewhat less pith than before, and remarked. “Don’t you mean…..craptop?”

Which ended the conversation, as she flounced upstairs in annoyance, leaving me to giggle inanely over my exquisite bon mot.

Dealing with a husband who has apparently grown a new appendage is one thing. Dealing with him while he blogs beside you in the marital bed at night is where she draws the line. The beer posts bother her the most, thanks to my lead fingered typing, omnipresent beer smell, and the horrible sounds that accompany every other sip.

Usually there’s a sniff, and then a bigger sniff, and I try to coax my crippled olfactory receptors into detecting a bouquet, followed by an inverse raspberry, one created by me pooling a sip of beer on the front of my tongue and drawing in air across it. This is supposedly done to spread the beer out over the taste buds, to pick out some of the subtler flavors. It sounds like Hannibal Lector discussing fava beans and niche chianti.

thipthipthipthip.

Wine tasters and beer judges do it a lot, and manage to look fairly professional about the whole thing.

I tend to cough a lot, and drool.

thipthip Hack. hack. Nice….hack.caramel…overtone….hack, wipe. Not a pretty sound or sight if you happen to be a seven months pregnant woman finally drifting off to sleep after an hour of arranging things so that neither your sore hips nor your bulging, gravid belly is complaining about the extra heavy nighttime gravity.

So I was dismissed, and sent to the computer room/guest bedroom to finish my beer and record my thoughts there.

“Please don’t throw me in dat dere briar patch,” I said, and was rewarded with a face full of pillow.

Married life is so romantic.

Speaking of marriage, back to the Dirty Dick’s. It’s a very nice reddish brown ale with a fairly fast disappearing head. As always, not much of a bouquet, but that’s my fault, not the beer’s. I can smell it, of course, but I don’t have the nose to separate out any specific themes. Smooth, glassy mouth feel, with an initial faint taste of spun sugar. It’s a fairly hoppy ale, though far less so than the Brutal Bitter of the previous night, with a strong citrus note, something you should find in almost all bitters. (I prefer bitters at the moment, and bought a number of them on the last trip to the beer store, which is why there’s been several reviewed. Alts, whites and hefewiezens also grab the spotlight now and again as well.) There’s kind of a slight charcoal type finish, reminiscent of mesquite chips. I think this is probably what most people would call “oaky.” A good beer with peanuts, but then again, what beer isn’t?

Here’s another review.

And we have a request in, to review a child of the Philippines, San Miguel Dark Lager. I’ll see if I can locate some.

Something to Sing At The

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

Something to Sing At The Peace Demonstration

We shall bomb Saddam
We shall bomb Saddam
We shall bomb Saddam some day

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

We’ll walk Glock in hand
We’ll walk Glock in hand
We’ll walk Glock in hand some day

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

He shall not be free
He shall not be free
He shall not be free some day

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

He shall be betrayed
He shall be betrayed
He shall be betrayed some day*

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

We won’t stand alone
We won’t stand alone
We won’t stand alone some day

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

The whole free world around
The whole free world around
The whole free world around some day

Oh, deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall bomb Saddam some day

We shall bomb Saddam
We shall bomb Saddam
We shall bomb Saddam some day

*Alternative verse to sing at the demonstrators;

Ye should all be spayed
Ye should all be spayed
Ye should all be spayed some day

Update: Blog O’Dob chimes in with something to sing at a Dixie Chicks concert.
Zod: Update, for a freaking lyrics post? What are you, the Dan Rather of the Dr. Demento set?

How Exactly Does Leaving Saddam

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

How Exactly Does Leaving Saddam In Power Promote Peace and Justice In Iraq?

Peace and Justice spokesperson, Andrea Buffa, confounded by Mohammed.

The D.J.’s page is here.

Playing Clue Want to know

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

Playing Clue

Want to know why Dwight Watson is holding the Reflecting Pool hostage?

Here’s a clue

Farmer Dwight Watson of Whitakers said his quota has been cut in half over the past five years, from about 120 acres to 55 acres. The business is regulated by the government, Watson said, and the government can turn the farmers’ problems around.

“Why is the American tobacco farmer being put out of business when we grow the best tobacco in the world?” he asked.

Here’s another

Dwight Watson told me that when he sells a 700-pound bale of tobacco, he clears about $150 after expenses. That bale makes about 16,000 packs of cigarettes. If those packs are sold in New York City, the federal, state and local governments will have pocketed $58,000 in taxes on Watson’s bale of tobacco. Each year, the tobacco industry generates about $13 billion in taxes.

If someone dies at the end of this standoff, and odds are it will be Mr. Watson, then the culprit will be the Government, in the House, with a gavel. If we deny farmers the right to grow a crop of their choice on their own land, and then in effect indefinitely refuse to compensate them, then we’ll see more tractors in the reflecting pool.

Mr. Watson will just be the first in a series.

Round and Round She Goes,

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

Round and Round She Goes, Where She Stops, Nobody Knows

Must install more ceiling fans.

Don’t think I need a Nokia, though.

God Help Me, I Do

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

God Help Me, I Do Love It So

I love the smell of Patton in the morning. Smells like….victory.

Zod:You’re quite the schizophrenic, you know that?
No, I had not a single clue.

A moment of silence, please

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Kehaar – Comments Off

A moment of silence, please

King’s BBQ owner dies in shooting accident. Best BBQ east of I-95, for sure.

Going to Hell Over the

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Woundwort – Comments Off

Going to Hell

Over the course of the past year, all 3 of us here at Silflay Hraka have written things that will probably get us a one-way ticket straight to hell. No sense in stopping that now.. For some reason the image of President Bush giving us his “what I pray for” speech a week or so ago has stuck in my mind. So, here is the latest prayer that may have been offered up by Bush.

Prayer 3-17-2003

Dear God:

Did you see me up there tonight? It was so cool, instead of walking down that long corridor to the podium I just sort of appeared from stage right, kind of like “BAM!”, here I am America. Probably had Saddam jumping in his seat with that one. Lord, thank you for giving me wisdom during these tough times. Please continue to guide me in the decisions that I make, and help me to protect as many of our men and women in the armed services as possible. Thank you for giving me the patience to get through these last few months, and for letting me live in such a big house with a bowling alley. I like the sound it makes when the ball hits those pins……….CRASH!!!!! That is really neat.

Lord, please let this campaign in Iraq be a quick one, one that causes few casualties. Please allow our military to be victorious, and give me another opportunity to use the term “evildoers” in public. Please take care of my family, especially those that have taken to drinking like a greyhound takes to racing. Father, I hope that you will continue to protect the U.S., and give me the strength to take care of what needs to be done. For Lord, the world thinks I am a cowboy…………..on a steel horse I ride. I’m going to get Saddam, dead or alive.

Lord, if you can find a way for me to fit that into a speech I would really appreciate it.

Amen

See you in hell.

The Oscars Will Go On

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18th, 2003 by Woundwort – Comments Off

The Oscars Will Go On

Officials have said that the impending war with Iraq will not affect the plan to hold the 75th Oscar awards show on Sunday………………WHOOPIDEEDOO!!!!! Oh, those brave men and women of Hollywood. Bless them for being brave enough to still put on their ugly ass dresses and expensive tuxes and still have the fortitude to get into that limo and take that ride all the way to the venue. I admire them so much for continuing with this program when there is such a threat of…………well, when there is the possibility of……………….maybe some woman will charge the stage and protest the wearing of furs or something of that nature. God Bless Hollywood!!!

Beer of the Night A

Posted in Demon Liquor on March 18th, 2003 by Bigwig – Comments Off

Beer of the Night

A quick review, for I’m already looking at only five hours sleep. Rogue Brutal Bitter – It’s brutal indeed. Most people would use the “very hoppy, very citrusy” phrase in describing it. They’re correct, but misleading. It tastes like the white stuff Mother Nature wraps grapefruit wedges in.

This is not necessarily bad. It’s just not a beer to drink alone. It needs accompaniment. I’d say it would go well with Brie and Townhouse crackers, if I was eating Brie.

That’s my review. Here’s a real one.