Cockpit Conversation
Bigwig’s description of Iraq lobbing SAMs at our guys made me start thinking about what those pilots might talk about when they are flying over that God forsaken region of the world. This is the description of the images that ran through my head after reading that. It is my idea of a possible conversation between pilot and co-pilot in U.S. Aircraft flying in the “safe zone” near Iraq:
Co-pilot: Chandler is so much funnier than Ross.
Pilot: No way dude, Ross is funnier and gets a lot more chicks.
Co-pilot: Sure he gets more chicks but then he turns them into lesbians.
Pilot: He doesn’t turn them into lesbians, they were………….
Co-pilot: Hey, wait a minute.
Pilot: What’s the matter?
Co-pilot: Did you see something down there?
Pilot: No, I didn’t see anything.
Co-pilot: I’m pretty sure I saw something??..I’m going to shoot a missile.
Pilot: You can?t just shoot a missile because you thought you saw something.
Co-pilot: Sure I can. I mean, who really gives a shit?
Pilot: Shouldn?t you wait until we see something else, or pick up something on the radar?
Co-pilot: What for? People do it all the time, and who cares? It?s Iraq for Christ?s sake.
Pilot: Isn?t there a rule against it or something?
Co-pilot: The rule says that we should blow their shit up before they can blow our shit up.
Pilot: What movie did you get that from? Was it Reservoir Dogs? Or Die Hard maybe?
Co-pilot: No dumbass, he said, ?Yippee Kai-aaaaa, Mother Fucker.?
Pilot: Oh yeah………..but he did blow some shit up.
Co-pilot: Now, let me see??..I?m going to shoot this one right into the middle of that barn and send it right up that camel?s ass.
SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
(Quiet?????.)
BLAMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
Pilot: Oh, my God!!
Co-pilot: Holy shit, did you see that?
Pilot: Dude!!
Co-pilot: Dude!!
Pilot: Dude!!
(Quiet……….)
Co-pilot: But don’t you think that Rachel is much hotter than Monica?
