Silflay Hraka

Money Dance! Thanks to our Paypal tipster! Only $399,995 to go for the communal beach house.

Superman May Fly Again

Found on an AOL NEWS page:

Paraplegic Woman Walked After Nerve Graft

LOS ANGELES (Aug. 30) - An experimental nerve-graft surgery allowed a paraplegic woman whose spinal cord was severed in an automobile accident to reacquire limited use of her legs, an Italian doctor reported this week at a conference in California. In a 14-hour surgery performed in July 2000, Dr. Giorgio Brunelli, of the Universita’ di Brescia, Italy, removed a portion of the 28-year-old’s sciatic nerve and used it as a graft to connect the undamaged portion of her spine to muscles in her buttocks and thighs. He said the graft allowed the regrowth of nerves connected to the central nervous system into the muscle tissue. The unidentified patient first showed movement in her legs in September and since has begun walking with assistance, Brunelli said. The woman had used a wheelchair for five years prior to the surgery.

Guns A Blazin’

Hey, great news!!! Guns ‘n’ Roses are back…………and apparently they suck! Admittedly, I was a fan of the group, but someone apparently forgot to tell Axl that it isn’t 1987, and nobody cares anymore. Hell, they aren’t the same band anyway. They have changed members more often than Menudo or Destiny’s Child.

Here is a critique of their performance last night at the MTV Music Awards (did anybody even know that was on???), found at Metal Sludge. Apparently Axl’s voice has disappeared just like his hairline.

Overture! Hit the lights!

Sammy: Ladies and Gentlemen. Mr. Daffy Duck!
Daffy Duck: Thank you, thank you. You’re too kind. Thay, what am I here for, Thammy?
Sammy: You’re here to introduce the next link, Daffy.
Daffy Duck: Tho I am, Thammy, tho I am.
Zod: These guys better not be making more than scale for this.
Daffy Duck: Thut up, Thod.
Sammy: What he said, baby.
Daffy Duck: And now, without further adieu, the next link. “Meryl’th Thulking”
Zod: That’s it? I’ve got to wade through duck spittle for the next two days for that?
It’s important to do things right, man.
Zod: Goddamn birds are unsanitary.
Daffy Duck: Kith my ath, Thod. At leatht I have a career. C’mon, Thammy, let’th go to Wolfgang’th plathe and get thome thuthi.
Sammy: Ciao, baby.

Cockpit Conversation

Bigwig’s description of Iraq lobbing SAMs at our guys made me start thinking about what those pilots might talk about when they are flying over that God forsaken region of the world. This is the description of the images that ran through my head after reading that. It is my idea of a possible conversation between pilot and co-pilot in U.S. Aircraft flying in the “safe zone” near Iraq:

Co-pilot: Chandler is so much funnier than Ross.

Pilot: No way dude, Ross is funnier and gets a lot more chicks.

Co-pilot: Sure he gets more chicks but then he turns them into lesbians.

Pilot: He doesn’t turn them into lesbians, they were………….

Co-pilot: Hey, wait a minute.

Pilot: What’s the matter?

Co-pilot: Did you see something down there?

Pilot: No, I didn’t see anything.

Co-pilot: I’m pretty sure I saw something??..I’m going to shoot a missile.

Pilot: You can?t just shoot a missile because you thought you saw something.

Co-pilot: Sure I can. I mean, who really gives a shit?

Pilot: Shouldn?t you wait until we see something else, or pick up something on the radar?

Co-pilot: What for? People do it all the time, and who cares? It?s Iraq for Christ?s sake.

Pilot: Isn?t there a rule against it or something?

Co-pilot: The rule says that we should blow their shit up before they can blow our shit up.

Pilot: What movie did you get that from? Was it Reservoir Dogs? Or Die Hard maybe?

Co-pilot: No dumbass, he said, ?Yippee Kai-aaaaa, Mother Fucker.?

Pilot: Oh yeah………..but he did blow some shit up.

Co-pilot: Now, let me see??..I?m going to shoot this one right into the middle of that barn and send it right up that camel?s ass.

SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

(Quiet?????.)

BLAMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Pilot: Oh, my God!!

Co-pilot: Holy shit, did you see that?

Pilot: Dude!!

Co-pilot: Dude!!

Pilot: Dude!!

(Quiet……….)

Co-pilot: But don’t you think that Rachel is much hotter than Monica?

New Friends of Hraka
Assume the Position -
Zod: Go into doggie submission!
Quiet you.

Assume the Position - I am not talking about escalating the War on Terror if sufficient evidence is found linking Iraq to direct support of international terrorism, I am talking about the ongoing war (state of armed hostilities) with Iraq. The war where Iraq routinely launches SAMs and fires AAA at US aircraft and the US routinely blows up their SAM, AAA, integrated air defense, and command and control sites. Let’s look back one year ago, prior to the WTC / Pentagon / Flight 93 attacks, to August 2001 and see what was happening with Operation NORTHERN WATCH (ONW) and Operation SOUTHERN WATCH (OSW) in the No-Fly Zones in Iraq:

August 30, 2001: “. . . Operation SOUTHERN WATCH Coalition aircraft used precision-guided weapons today to strike a military radar in southern Iraq . . .”

And

War Liberal - Let me exercise my rights — while I still have them — and say that 49% of Americans are a bunch of subliterate, underintelligent, drooling, mouthbreathing, cryptofascist jackasses who deserve to spend the rest of their lives watching Touched By An Angel reruns on the PAX network.

Zod: What, no blathering about the New Left?
That’s not ready yet
Zod: You got a perfect example here.
When it’s done
Zod: Pussy

mmmmmm…..cheesy

Every now and then I toy with the idea of posting massive lists of useless personal information to the ‘Net, something like an alphabetical listing of of all my compact discs, as if someone would stumble across it and experience an epiphany. Holy Cow! He owns Banarama’s Greatest Hits and every Cake cd! Truly, this cd listing has convinced me that the man should start his own religion, and I shall be his number one disciple.

The older I get the lesser this impetus is. First, it would be a gigantic pain to type them all in. Second and more importantly, lists like that are boring. Third, the most likely insight into my soul? Man, this anal loser has some really crappy musical tastes.

I don’t care. This Bananarama album rocks.

Fear my mighty mipples!

Ok, so the 1632/1633 book review has become the Energizer Bunny of posts. I get another…. what should I call them? Meme ripple?…mripple?…mipples? Ooooo, mipples. I like that. I get another mipple every couple of days.

Philosoblog just finished reading 1632, and has compiled a list of American moral principles as expressed by the characters. Among them;

It?s okay to own a gun.

The fact that we aren?t morally perfect doesn?t show that our values aren?t the best.

‘Course, he doesn’t say if he liked it or not. Well, Philoso?

The Return of Zod

A reader comments that….
Zod: What do you mean “a” reader?
It’s a person, he’s reading.
Zod: “a” implies that you have multiple readers.
We do have multiple readers.
Zod: Only if you count me and the two bugs.
Fine, I’m counting you and the bugs.
Zod: Just keeping you honest.
You done?
Zod: Certainly.
Fine.
Zod: Fine.

A reader comments…
Zod: His name’s Andy. Can’t you just say Andy?
I using the editorial voice, you ass.
Zod: Is that the one you used to try out on the dog after you read Dune?
I’m trying to do a post here.
Zod: “You will fetch the stick, Towser.”
Fine, just keep talking, I’m ignoring you.
Zod: The book said only a Bene Gesserit could use the Voice.
One of our many dedicated readers, Andy Freeman…
Zod: But no, you thought you could be the Kwisach-Haderach.
wrote in to say that he couldn’t remember…
Zod: Your mother looked for that nutmeg for weeks.
The Drunken Philosopher’s song.
Zod: Still, better than that time you decided you were the Antichrist.
This is basically the same to us as waving…
Zod: And now there’s this reincarnation of Churchill obsession.
a red flag in front of a bull..
Zod: Megalomaniac.
You’re calling me a megalomaniac, Mr. “Bring me the son of Jor-el?”
Zod: Well, look who’s back. Once again we know who’s zooming who.
“Who’s zooming who?” What, you channeling Aretha?
Aretha: You know it girl.
Zod: Ahhhh! Begone, foul shade! Back to the pit that spawned you!
Aretha: You better give me some R-E-S-P-E-C-T, or I’m going to kick you right in the T-E-E-T-H, white boy.
Zod: You will submit to Zod!. There can be only one!
Highlander: There can be only one!
Zod: Shit.
Aretha: Unless there’s a sequel, or TV show, or a breakfast cereal…
Highlander: Look, I asked for final cut, but the damn producers…
Umm, Guys?
Zod: Zod will destroy you!
Highlander: Oh, shut up, Little Dick.
Zod: Zod does not have a little dick!
Getting kind of crowded in there guys.
Aretha: Aretha knows better, honey.
Zod: That water was cold and you know it!
Highlander: A man’s sword must fit into his sheath.
Zod: I’ll do you, mate. Keep talking.
I’ll just let ya’ll thrash this out, ok? Get back to me when you’ve decide who the primary voice is.
Zod: You can have his mind when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
Aretha: I am going to smack this honky’s ass into next week.
Highlander: My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my fadda…Wait, that’s not right…

Ok, while I’ve got some peace here. Andy Freeman not only couldn’t remember all of the Drunken Philosopher’s song, the part he did remember he misquoted, which to a deep down soul pedant like myself is the same as a red flag to a bull.

The Philosopher’s Drinking Song

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.

There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya
’bout the raisin’ of the wrist.
Socrates himself was permanently pissed.

John Stewart Mill, of his own free will,
after half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away,
‘alf a crate of whiskey every day!
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
and Hobbes was fond of his Dram.
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:
“I drink, therefore I am.”

Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he’s pissed.

Zod: Ok, that’s taken care of. Now where……oh bugger, he’s done.